random thoughts

I always appear smarter when I dress up in my giant nipple costume. I know this because I'll overhear people say things like, "At least he's not a complete boob."
-Jarod Kintz

I want to write a poem about "Truth," "Honor," "Dignity," and whether the toilet paper should roll over or under when you pull on it.
-Jarod Kintz

Father Flannigan's Whiskey wants to remind you that wherever there are four Irish Catholics, there's always a fifth.
-Pete Blankenhorn

I love having a ceiling fan, although sometimes I wish he wouldn't cheer so loud when I'm trying to sleep.
-Jarod Kintz

If loving someone is putting them in a strait jacket and kicking them down a flight of stairs, then yes, I have loved a few people.
-Jarod Kintz